Neuroscience has shown that neurons that fire together wire together. In other words, repeated thoughts create a pathway in your brain. We get better at what we practice.
You can change or replace thoughts, which affect words and actions, as part of your work toward a desired change.
- First of all, notice your thoughts. Just for the moment let go of the thoughts and ask yourself, “Where am I feeling this in my body?” Locate the feelings in your body. Now you have separated thoughts and feelings.
- Write down the thoughts (literally, the words), make a note of the feelings associated with the thoughts, and note the time of day.
- When you have a chance, review the thoughts and feelings you’ve noted. Do the thoughts repeat themselves with an uncomfortable degree of regularity? Do the feelings associated with these thoughts cause you pain, anxiety or discomfort?
If the answer to number 3 is yes, you can now begin to work on the thoughts and feelings separately. You may try to distract yourself from the unwanted thoughts when they arise, for example, with music. Or you may try to replace those thoughts with other, more positive or productive thoughts. You have the power to choose your thoughts — make new choices, create new stories!
If you have read older posts in this blog, you know that I personally belive in meditation as a key tool for this. Meditation can help you to separate your thoughts and feelings and regain peace of mind by breaking the feedback loop of negative thoughts fed by negative feelings.
A good therapist – a good, therapeutic relationship — can shine transformational light on the relationship between your thoughts and emotions, and help you find the right tools to begin working on those connections.
Please comment or contact me for more information about how this process my work for you!